Enclosed is my 2000 tax return & payment. Please take note of the
attached article from USA Today newspaper. In the article, you will
see that the Pentagon is paying $171.50 for hammers and NASA has
paid $600.00 for a toilet seat.

Please find enclosed four toilet seats (value $2400) and six hammers
(value $1029). This brings my total payment to $3429.00. Please note
overpayment of $22.00 and apply it to the "Presidential Election Fund,"
as noted on my return. Might I suggest you the send the above mentioned
fund a "1.5 inch screw." (See attached article...HUD paid $22.00 for a 1.5
inch phillips head screw.)

It has been a pleasure to pay my tax bill this year, and I look forward
to paying it again next year.

Sincerely,

A satisfied taxpayer